Chapter Two : Not Again…

Well well well nerds… here we are again.  I’m out on another adventure, and you are either bored as hell or looking to craft your editing skills.  On that note, let’s set a few ground rules for this second go around.

1) Be Nice

I get it.  I’m not the greatest technical writer.  A lifetime of parent-teacher conferences, standardized test scores, and frat email chain ridicule has made this abundantly clear to me.  More specifically, I can’t spell.  On a tangent here, why is it that it is somewhat fashionable to suck at math, but not being able to spell is unforgivable in society? How many times have I seen some bimbo publicly announce they are unable to calculate a 10% tip only to find moronic solidarity around the table.  When I announce that I can’t read, however, everyone mentally photo-shops a dunce cap on me. Also, when anyone wants someone to understand an obvious point they say “do the math”.  WTF society?  Make up your damn minds!  Is math easy for you or hard?  It can’t be both.  Do the F-ing math on that.  Sorry… I’m just angry that I had to spell check 17 words in this paragraph.

The only real point I want to make is that just like winter is coming for the Stark family, spelling and grammar errors are coming for the readers of this blog.  Like the Sharks right after their brawl with the Jets I just want you to be cool. When I posted blog entries from Australia 80% of the comments I received back were snarky grammar corrections.  I’m here poring my black heart out, and all I get in response is “wow did you skip 5th grade English?  You use they’re not their when trying to say they are”.  I want to get it right, so feel free to send along corrections.  Just be cool about it.

2) I’m not “looking for” anything

If one more person tells me “I hope you find what you are looking for” in regards to my trip then I’m going to punch you in the back of the head.  I find that statement so condescending it makes me sick.   I’m not looking to “find myself”.  If I needed to do that then I’d simply go to O Dream Board like I do in any moment of existential crisis.

 

Okay, those are my only rules.  Does this entry seem angrier than normal?  It’s probably because I’m 1 week into my 4 month trip and thus far it has been defined by rain and one of the most terrifying experiences of my life.  I’ll write about that on my next entry.

-James

My new Kit Fisto key chain is my trips talisman

My new Kit Fisto key chain gives me strength in the dark moments of my trip.

Saying goodbye to Lucy was the hardest of all

Saying goodbye to Lucy was the hardest of all

Many miles to go before I sleep

Many miles to go before I sleep

The Ooze is the general of my black/green with a splash of white magic deck which I brought on the road

APT taught me to play Magic The Gathering in my last weeks at work. The Ooze is the general of my black/green deck with a splash of white. I’ve brought it on the road and look forward to some Friday night Magic around the country.

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